Remember

One woman complained to a friend that she couldn’t remember anything from one day to the next.

“Let me get this straight,” he said. “You can’t remember anything from one day to the next. How long has this been going on?”

She said, “How long has what been going on?”

Even if your memory is perfect, it may still help to focus on the few things you really need to remember. This list, compiled from several sources, may be all you really need to remember..

• Remember that your presence is a gift (a present) to the world.
• Remember that you are a unique and unrepeatable being.
• Remember that you are still becoming what you will be.
• Remember to relax; each day just comes one at a time.
• Remember to count your blessings, not your troubles.
• Remember that you have sufficient courage to face whatever comes along.
• Remember that most of the answers you need are within you.
• Remember that decisions are too important to leave to chance.
• Remember to always reach for the best that is within you.
• Remember that nothing wastes more energy than worry.
• Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
• Remember that the longer you carry a grudge, the heavier it gets.
• Remember not to take things too seriously; there’s always reason to laugh.
• Remember that happiness is more often found in giving than getting.
• Remember that life’s greatest treasures are people, not things.
• Remember that a little love goes a long way.
• Remember that a lot goes forever.

-- Steve Goodier

How Will You Be Remembered?

Three friends were discussing death and one of them asked, "What would you like people to say about you at your funeral?"

The first of the friends said, "I would like them to say, 'He was a great humanitarian, who cared about his community.'"

The second answered, "I hope they say, 'She was a great wife and mother, who was an example for her family."'

The third friend responded, "I would like them to say, 'Look! He's moving!'"

Other than "Look! He's moving!" -- what would you hope others might say about you at your funeral?

A friend once told me of a caring and much-loved school nurse who died. She was well known by the faculty and students, as she had been there 35 years. When the principal announced her death to the children, many of them began to cry.

To help ease their grief, the school counselor had a group of children draw a picture of what the nurse meant to them. One child filled in her paper with red. "This is her heart," she explained. "It's too big for the paper."

At her funeral her friends and family clapped and celebrated her life. She left behind a great legacy of love.

How will you be remembered? What legacy will you leave behind?

Toward the end of his life, author and theologian Elton Trueblood made this observation: "At the age of 93, I am well aware that I do not have many years to live. Consequently, I try very hard to live my remaining years in such a manner that I really make a difference in as many lives as possible. How do I want to be remembered? Not primarily as a Christian scholar, but rather as a loving person. This can be the goal of every individual. If I can be remembered as a truly loving person, I shall be satisfied."

After you are gone, people may forget most of what you have said and done. But they will remember that you loved them.

-- Steve Goodier

Image: flickr.com/Jetske

To Remember Is to Understand

Does this sound familiar?

James was cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from a shoe repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed it was over eleven years old. He felt sure the shoes would not still be there, but decided to stop by and check anyway.

He handed the ticket to the man behind the counter, who scowled at the date. "Just a minute," said the clerk. "I'll have to look for these." He disappeared into a back room.

After a few minutes, the clerk called out, "What do you know – here they are!"

"That's terrific!" said James, hardly believing his good fortune.

The man came back to the counter, empty-handed. "They'll be ready Thursday," he said.

I hope James is the patient sort.

We should all be masters of patience; after all, we've had plenty of practice. But mustering patience with unreasonable people (including ourselves) may seem more than we can manage some days.

I heard about an elderly patient in an American hospital who was recovering from a medical procedure. He decided to take a look at his recovery-room record attached to the bed frame. He leafed through the pages, then stopped at one particular notation and furled his brow in consternation.

"I know I was in a bit of a muddle, but I didn't realize I was that bad," he said apologetically to his nurse. "I hope I didn't offend anyone."

She glanced to the spot where he pointed. “Don’t worry,” she said. “SOB doesn’t mean what you think. It stands for ‘short of breath.’”

But I suspect that in some cases it does have a double meaning. Especially if the patient is in pain, fearful or just plain out of sorts. (And that probably goes for some of the hospital staff, too.)

Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher once said, “I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end.” But we don’t always get our own way. And patience can be taxed beyond reason.

Where does understanding come from when it feels as if there is nothing left?

I've learned that it can come from the simple act of remembering. To remember is to understand. It is not about gritting one’s teeth and forcing oneself to be more patient. It is actually easier than that.

Do you remember what it was like to be a child? No parent should ever forget. And to remember is to understand.

Do you remember what it was like to be a student? Every teacher should try to remember, and especially if they feel frustrated.

Do you remember what it is like to be a patient? Doctors and nurses show more empathy after they have also spent time in a hospital bed.

Do you remember what it was like to be lonely? To be first? To be last? To fail? To succeed? To be afraid? To remember is to understand.

And to understand is to be patient.

-- Steve Goodier

Image: flickr.com/steve: they can't all be zinge